As 2013 comes to a close .....

The sky is dark grey
The sun has left for today, to rise again tomorrow.
This now, old year comes to a close, tomorrow a new year will begin......

All endings are beginnings, all beginnings are endings ... I don't remember who said that... Shakespeare? Maybe ....

I'm not a great fan of New Year's Eve, for me it's always a time of reflection. Thinking about what has been and what is yet to come.

This past year has been a total mixture of everything, happy times, disappointments, family times, transitions, actively leaving the past behind, searching for a new future, moving home, enjoying nature and all life's simplicity, shunning old habits, getting rid of the clutter both physical and mentally .... as the year ends I'm feeling quite tired, but always hopeful that the future will bring good things, meaningful times, love and friendships....

I will be starting a new job in January, I'm nervous, I want it to be the right path for me. My three words for 2014 are confidence, caring and creativity. I want to rid myself of the anxiety I often feel about life itself, caring for people will be a big part of my new path, and it is vital that I find that creative spark inside me once again. It has been missing for these past few months, but its my creativity that gives me peace, happiness and a sense of self worth. Caring for those who need a little help will be good for me; I hope that I in turn can bring a little light into their lives.

Who knows what will have taken place by the end of 2014. My destiny is of my own doing, only I can make things happen and I sincerely hope that I do.

Christmas Light

A walk on the beach .......

Building a Website

I've spent many hours today building a new website on Weebly.com. It has several more options now, the site has been enormously improved. It wasn't any good a few months ago because as a photographer I basically just need to showcase my work. But I can do that now, and it has a store option where I can sell my work.

Its not easy though. Probably more to do with my lack of website building skills than that of Weebly. As I said I've been building my site for hours. Uploading images doesn't take too long, but its getting the right aesthetics, the right words, the right information... I know that the more I use it the easier it will become. And the best thing for me right now is that its Free. You can pay to upgrade but the free site is more than adequate for my needs.

a LINK to my website ..... not yet finished or polished as it were ... but at least a start! 

http://penelopedaviesart.weebly.com/

Its absolutely awful outside today so this is a good day to stay indoors where its warm, dry and cosy. It would have been even better if there was a good film on the TV instead of the usual over sentimental American movies that Channel 5 dish out every day ...Yawn!

I do need a break from my website building so I may delve into the Robert Goddard novel that I've just started  called Fault Line.Caught in the Light. It did jump around a bit, but I was hooked and unable to put it down.

Book Covers found on Google Books Search

 

I've only read one of his books previously, which I thoroughly enjoyed called

On the other hand, I do have Christmas Presents looking at me that need wrapping!

Memories of Loved Ones at Christmas

Christmas is always a time to remember those who are no longer here with us to celebrate. Sadly there are many family members and friends that I miss, not only at Christmas, but all year around. But there is something more poignant about their absence at Christmas. The anniversary of many of their deaths is around Christmas and New Year. My mother, my eldest brother, my friends Oscar, Yvonne, Neil, David, and Enfys, all taken from us between December 4th and January 12th. So they are all very much in my heart and my thoughts at this time. And also my Dad who left us in March 2010.

I'm not a good story teller and the memories I'm going to share here probably wont read well but they are my special memories and I want to remember loved ones today ...

My mother left me with 101 happy memories, probably many more if I could remember them.

Mam 1972 playing the organ at Begelly Arms, West Wales

But the overwhelming sense I have of her is her inability to control her attacks of the giggles. She had a wicked sense of humour, and was also the butt of many a practical joke carried out by my youngest brother. She would break into a fit of the giggles at the most inappropriate times. Once a male singer came to our home for an audition. Mam was a pianist for a concert party called "Adar Y Banc." I dont remember why she had a fit of the giggles, or what it was about this man that made her shake with laughter, I just remember her shoulders shaking, her unsuccessful efforts to try and stop laughing, and when the man left, seemingly quite unaware of the effect he had had on my mother and all of us, Mam literally fell off her chair because of her uncontrollable giggles. I can remember leaving the room while the man was singing unable to cope with my own growing need to burst into laughter. I still smile at the memory. I can see her and hear her as if she were in the room with me now. It will be 29 years since she had to leave us.

My Dad ....

I'm not sure when this was taken, (1940's/50's) or who my dad is with ...

Me and my Dad in our garden at home, superimposed with the above picture

.... before starting school, I would spend every minute possible with my Dad...on rare occassions as a treat, sitting high up in the Milk Lorry he drove for work, collecting the milk churns from the farms in West Wales, standing up on the back seat of the car going to collect my sister Elizabeth from school, in the garden helping to plant and nurture the many fruits and vegetables he grew there, collecting apples and pears from our orchards .... these are amazing memories that I cherish now and will for evermore. My dad lived a long life and passed away in 2010. He missed my mother after her death in 1985, he worried constantly about all of us, his children, and he lived as full a life as he could. Only when illness overcame him and he could no longer do all the things he enjoyed doing, I think then he gave up.

This is all for today .... I'll share memories of friends another day ..........

A little bit of Christmas ...

Decorating the Christmas Tree has never been one of my greatest gifts ... It always ends up looking a little haphazzard but still its sparkly....its the effort that counts isn't it! A couple of weeks ago I made the cake, I think I may have left it in the over a bit too long, but I'm hoping that I haven't burned it and that it wont affect the taste too much! Today I've covered it in marzipan in preparation for the icing next weekend. 

Mobile pics .....

 

I'm excited to see both my children who will be arriving on the 21st December....it will be so lovely to spend Christmas with them ...cant wait :)